Winter Musings

Weather: Oh dear god, SNOW SNOW AND MORE SNOW!!! AND COLD! (Typical Michigan Winter in other words!)

So I’ve fallen off the blogging bandwagon for a bit, mostly due to health and brain foo. Plus there’s been a metric ton of snow that has needed to be shoveled. So far, we have accumulated approximately 18 inches in general, with drifting as deep as two feet in spots. Doesn’t seem like a lot until you have to shovel it in single digit temps. But being a Midwesterner, you just layer up and get out and do it, knowing there are warm beverages and food waiting for you when it’s done. So much soup and tea and casseroles, I tell you!

Currently, the state of Texas is suffering from a rare snow storm — thanks Polar Vortex!– and a lot of people are in the dark and freezing due to some stupid bad planning on the part of their state government when it comes to their energy infrastructure. Help is being sent (Thanks, POTUS!) , but I feel terrible for the people who are not used to this cold and are not equipped for it. I have family and friends who are going on their third day of no power in 20º temps. Makes me angry when suffering is preventable and the powers that be take no accountability. But that’s a rant for another time. Keeping all the citizens in my thoughts. The officials are getting a different type of energy sent their way. Don’t piss of witches, is all I’m saying. 🧙🏻‍♀️🤨

It’s been a relatively normal winter here, but after 4 years of being spoiled., it feels worse for some reason. Probably a side effect of getting older. Feeling the cold in my joints more. Sigh.

On the project/ work front, I’m getting back to writing (I have so many damn books pending!) and working on crocheting/stitch craft in my spare time. I’m still trying to get my mosaic/jewelry work sorted. Time has gotten away from me, lost in some sort of navel gazing, self-pitying. stress induced haze. I started falling down the rabbit hole that is TikTok, mostly because the app doesn’t stress me out the way social media does. I’m finding that now that his orangeness is out of the WH, I’m finding the news to be a bit, refreshingly, boring. Not that there aren’t things that are still worrisome, or noteworthy, but I’m finding that knowing that there is someone at the top actually getting things back on track, I’m kinda less worried at an existential level. I’m also finding that I’m struggling with the self-flagellation that occurs when you exit the stress bubble and realize that not only did you lose an entire year to obsessing over every single news item, but you lost every inch of ground you had gained, health and wellness-wise, from the gym and therapy and overall living in the actual world. Of course we’re still dealing with Covid, so until both the husbeast and I are vaccinated, that is going to curtail a lot of activities I’d like to be doing. Soon, I hope. Both our parents are vaccinated so there’s a little relief there. My mum is 90% done with her cancer treatment. Things are starting to look up. Finances are still a bit sketchy, but we’re making do.

Bri and I have decided to start renovating the house. Mostly because we’re just fecking bored with the current design and colors, and a lot of our furniture is approaching the 20+ year wear and tear level. But there is another bludgeoning reality that we are probably going to be here for longer than we initially thought, so we are motivated to do some structural and cosmetic work here for us and, of course, for the future sale of the place. So I imagine there will be periodic house reno posts with photos in the upcoming year!

I’m also starting to pare down some skills I want to scrape the rust off, including some coding skills, research and professional skills that I haven’t used in a few years. Not sure what I want to start doing as a job (we need more income to finance our house reno addiction), but I’ll be blunt, I really am trying my damndest to get away from customer service. (Not easy and beggar’s can’t be choosers, yadda yadda yadda). We’ll see what happens.

Hope everyone is staying warm and safe in the current weird weather shenanigans! I promise to be a little more consistent with the posting here.

The return of Meh Monday…

Weather: High: 85 degrees & sunny. Possible rain later.

The weekend started off so promisingly…Sigh.

Friday was the Torchwood finale. I think my chest still hurts. That was incredibly hard to watch. And possibly the best ending to the best 5 days of tv I’ve seen in a good long while. I’ll probably get strung up by some of TW Fandom for saying that, but the mini-series elicited all the strong emotions it should have. If you didn’t come away from it hating politicians and the government in general, I don’t think you watched closely enough. I realize it’s fictional, but let’s be honest. The possibility of something like this happening, aliens aside, is frighteningly possible. We are a reactionary species. And our reactions don’t tend to be reasoned ones when something  threatens our families. Bluntly honest here, I despise most politicians. Of BOTH parties in this country. Most of the people that have been elected in the past 20 years or so have done so based highly on their charm and television presence.  I’ll take a boring candidate who knows his shit, over a highly polished and quip happy candidate who spends every minute on the microphone playing evasive games to avoid exposing that he knows NOTHING. But guess who we inevitably elect.  I can go on about this for ages, but I don’t want the vein to start popping out in my forehead again. Sigh. So yes. I liked Torchwood: Children of Earth a lot. And it made me take a good hard look at a lot of things ACTUALLY going on in the world. We really should be ashamed of ourselves as a species. But that is a much longer blog post than I have time or energy to write. Maybe later.

Saturday was nice and quiet and replete with housecleaning. And the evening was nicely rounded out by Being Human which is now my new tv obsession. Don’t get me started. I can go on about this show for a good long time. Nutshell? Irish Vampire. Adorkable Werewolf. Proper vampire effects. Lots of sex & blood & addiction metaphors. All things I hold close to my…heart. VBEG. Yes, this will be must see for me on Saturdays.
Here’s a vid on the Vampire “rules” in Being Human.

Sunday dawned with family stuff on the horizon, which evaporated thank goodness. So usual errand running and FINALLY some writing time.

Sat at the Dining room table, butt in chair for a good 4 hours straight. And realized fairly quickly that I needed to do some plot examination. Couldn’t really get my head around what was missing, what needed to be written and where all of it fell into place. So, lacking a giant whiteboard or a clear wall to stick things to, I MacGyvered myself a board by taking a large framed picture of  La Belle Dame Sans Merci we had lying around waiting to be hung, and used that instead. 🙂
My husband got a good chuckle seeing me prop this framed artwork on the arms of a chair and start covering the glass with post-its covered in my usual seizure-ridden serial killer scrawl.  (I swear that if someone wandered in and looked at my notes with an intent to figure out the ending, they wouldn’t be able to decipher the chicken scratch. ) So now I had a series of post-its with loose plot points (green), major plot points (yellow), transition points (pink) and final possible scenes (blue). Visually, it looks like a pastel factory exploded all over the picture, but it helped me a ton to see things laid out like that. As I’ve said before, whatever works for you is your writing method.

Well, water heater update: Tis fixed! (At the low low price of $600. Oy.) So at least I can shower when I get home tonight. Velly important after my 8 block walk in this sweltery weather.

I have True Blood to watch tonight and obviously need to put some time in at the Writing Cave.

Just saw the teaser Trailer for Dorian Gray, which will star Ben Barnes (Prince Caspian) and Colin Firth (of Mr. Darcy Fame). It looks exactly as dark and disturbing as the story warrants. I’m looking forward to it, practically salivating to be honest. Don’t know what it is about the whole debauchery side of the story that appeals to me. Granted the repercussions are well noted and the story’s message well played out. But I do have a part of my that revels in that sort of dark pleasure, even if it is vicariously. Gods know I write enough of it into my stories. Probably explains the vampire fetish, to be honest.

End of day has found me. Must close down and head for the train home.

Hoping for a productive evening.

—————-
Now playing: Midnight Syndicate – Witching Hour
via FoxyTunes

Back to the grind with a new attitude…

Weather:  High: 52 Degrees and rainy this pm. Schizophrenic. It was 36 degrees when I walked to work this morning.

Weather is reflecting my mood, but that’s nothing new.

Went to see Coraline over the weekend and it was FANTASTIC. Brian loved it as well. Was glad to see they did justice to the book, even the added character of Wyborne didn’t feel arbitrary. Visually stunning and very creepy in parts. WE were in a packed theater with a ton of 8- 10 year olds who were quiet through the whole film. Very cool!

Woke up this morning feeling much better physically, but still a bit tempestuous mentally and emotionally. For all my intentions of scaling back my online presence, all I’ve done is increase it. Sigh. So Today, I’m only keeping one tab open on Firefox, which is this one. And I’ll check my mail at lunch. But other than that, there will be no refreshing Facebook or LJ or Twitter. (Well, Twitter I can check from the bottom status bar– Thank you TwitterFox!)

Bri and I are both feeling quite feisty these days. I rather like it. The no bullshit attitude is getting things done for once. We’ve decided we’re going to do a basic fix up on the the downstairs bathroom. This means we need to get tile, a toilet and a sink. We’re not going to mess with putting a shower in as that requires too much work and we’re on limited time and resources. So we’re budgeting and figuring how we’ll purchase the stuff and how long that will extend the time to get it done. But we figure, it will only help the sale value of the house. We’re not planning on getting rich when we sell, but we’d at least like to make a small profit. (Our house isn’t that big, but it sits in a rather affluent neighborhood — we’re surrounded by houses ranging from $600K to a cool mill. ) Needless to say, if we can just get the cosmetic stuff done, the rest will fall into place. Good thing I married a Virgo. This house is in pretty damn good shape, even after 10 years of living here. Rugs are still almost new, the walls are in good shape and so are the appliances. So the real push is on to get things fixed…on a fixed income. Sigh.

Brian’s back freelancing this week and will be starting his first Master Gardner class on Thursday. Only downside is with it being in Crown Point, and us having the one car, I’ll be leaving early on Thursdays for the duration of the class. Wouldn’t be an issue, but my company recently instituted a new PTO policy and they dock down to 15 minutes. So I’ll be losing a grand total 2 days of PTO once the whole thing’s done. This new policy is because some people in my office were abusing the old PTO.  So everyone gets penalized now. Even if I left a 1/2 early, I’d have to claim it as PTO.  Sigh.  Anyway. My whine is small, though. As long as he gets to take this class and get his certification. He hasn’t been excited about something for quite a while. Not like I’m gonna be at this job for the full year.  Two days I can spare. 🙂

When we were driving home from Coraline yesterday, Bri and I both commented while we drove through the neighborhoods and the commercial districts about the complete disconnect we felt. We’re done with this area. While I’m not naive that every place in the world has the same cross section of people,  there are particular idiosyncrasies that are native to NW Indiana. A lot of them based in class and ethnic tensions. Rich versus poor, white collar versus blue collar, Right Wing Yahoos versus Tree Hugging Lefties.  It’s not all that uncommon. What we notice is the particular viciousness that accompanies everyone’s attempts to prove that “You’re not better than me!”  It’s this combination of insecurity driven bullying with the unfounded elitism that drives me nuts. I personally don’t think I’m better than pretty much anyone. I think I might be smarter than some, and maybe have more common sense than most, but does that make me a better person? Until I’ve saved a few lives or made some great sacrifice for the greater good, I’ll reserve stating that.  Maybe I’m just getting really cynical in my old age, but I really get disgusted at the way people in general look down their noses at others or revel in another person’s disgrace or downfall. Are there people who need to have their ego taken down a peg? Sure. But it’s not my job to do it, unless of course they make the grievous error of engaging me directly. Then all bets are off.

We have a problem in the country as a whole in that we love an underdog. We’ll cheer them on, make inspired speeches as they struggle, and even clap them on the back when they make something of themselves. But just as quickly, we are just as invested in making sure that once they’ve succeeded, we need to nit pick and critique their behavior, like we had some hand in making them, so they owe us. Such horseshit . We put our idols on pedestals, but dear gods do we crow when they stumble and fall off. Or better, we knock them down. How have we come to this?

It’s like the online court of review. You will find the harshest critics and worst dregs of humanity online when it comes to gossip sites and tabloid web pages. Now I’m just as fond of keeping up with famous people I like, for good or for bad, so don’t think I’m trying to monopolize some sort of moral high ground here. But the way people, even non-famous people, get torn down by their peers, or worse, by people too chickenshit to even use their real names, is just horrific! We seem to get some sort of morally superior self- righteous streak when we see some pretty model without her makeup or an actor get caught doing something bad. It’s like we use them to say “SEE! I’m better than THEY are! Losers!”
Like it matters in some sort of cosmic score board.
Online reviews of music or movies or books are simply a minefield of armchair critics. Now, I have a low opinion of most critics anyway, because who told you that your opinion trumps everyone else’s? Maybe that’s the root of the problem. Maybe we’ve become so driven to be correct or respected that we find the easy way out and tear others down around us.  Last word in an argument= Win!
I have no issue with people posting their opinion on something. That’s never been the problem. The PROBLEM arises when someone posts their opinions and then follows it with “and you’re an idiot if you think otherwise.”
See there’s the fall down right there. You have stated an OPINION. Even if you hang that tree with all sorts of factoids and snippets of OTHER people’s opinions, it’s still just YOUR OPINION. How can you decide for EVERYONE else what should or should not be listened to, viewed or read? Reviews are to give a person’s insight to an experience. To let us see something through your eyes. But to expect people to blithely go– Oh! Joe Smith hated it so I’d better avoid it because I wouldn’t want Joe Smith to think I was stupid and didn’t believe his outstanding opinion!– well…that’s kind of silly, actually. This falls back on my “No Guilty Pleasures” mantra. I like what I like, and I really give a toss what anyone thinks about me as a result. I like bands NO ONE in my friends circles or family likes. Same with movies and books. And it doesn’t make me rethink it. Ever.

I guess the nutshell from all this rambling is that if people could start distinguishing between what is opinion and what is fact, and what is IMPORTANT and what is TRIVIAL, maybe we would all be a lot happier. I’ve met some extremely MISERABLE people, and the one thing they all have in common? They constantly feel the need to pick on other people’s choices or prove that their choices are uninformed. They spend their lives just waiting to jump on anyone who likes something they don’t and try and make that person defensive about what they like. They quote statistics and facts and other armchair experts while ignoring the simple fact that they’ve just wasted all that time and energy trying to make someone else unhappy. Seriously. Where’s the victory in that? Do you feel better now that you’ve piled onto a friend and made them feel small and upset about something that actually gave them some measure of happiness? Because you needed to feel like your opinion was right? Sigh.
Why do people feel that if they’re not right, that their whole world will crumble. I admit I’m wrong all the time. That’s how you learn. I’ve had some people respond to my saying, “You know what? I was wrong.” with a snarky “I TOLD YOU! See! You were wrong!” Just rude. If someone is big enough to admit they’re wrong, don’t make them think it was a bad idea by humiliating them on top of it.

Okay, I’ve gone on long enough today. I need to funnel this verbosity into my fiction.

Parting note:  Before you give a friend a bunch of crap for liking something you find ridiculous, turn it around on yourself.  How would you feel if someone dressed you down for your taste in clothes, music or movies? Opinions are personal and based on nothing more than your view of something. You can’t make someone else take on your opinion. You can only share it and hope someone gets something out of it. Let’s start being nicer to each other.

On that note: Have a video.
Metronomy- A Thing for Me. Possibly the funniest video I’ve seen in a very long time! (And that’s my opinion! 😉 (If you want a copy-it’s the free video on i-Tunes until tomorrow!)
Vodpod videos no longer available.