Day before Turkey Apocalypse!

26 11 2008

weather: High: 41 degrees and SUNNY. LIKE FLAMING BALL OF EVIL SUNNY!

Bri’s got freelance work today, so we’re not sure what time he’s going home tonight. I luckily get to leave at 3 and head back home. Got a ton to do so maybe I can a lot done before having to pick him up from the train.

I’m gonna spend a portion of the time over the next few days getting this story wrapped up. I have the ending in mind and at least 4 major scenes need to be written. Once I get everything onto the laptop, I can take a serious look at everything and see if it’s as good as it is in my head or not.

The whole fam damily will be getting together tomorrow for zee Turkey Apocalypse. We’ll be swinging by the in-laws first to chat and have a drinky. THen off to my mum’s for dinner proper.

Turkey, Creamed onions (NOMNOMNOM), stuffing and all the rest of the trimmings, Mom is making extra turkey so we have some to take home. Yay for free food!HAve to admit there ‘s still some melancholy about Dad not being there. I know this is Thanksgiving # 3 without him, but it’s still painful.

Work is not happening today. ZOMG so DISTRACTED.

GOD DAMMIT!! Somebody just blew a fuse in our server room and took down ALL the servers and the entire phone and VM system! OF COURSE it has to happen a 1/2 hour before I have to leave!! EEJITS!

Gotta dash– I have to pick up my December monthly train pass and head on home!

Have a VERY happy Thanksgiving!


25 11 2008

weather: High: 36 degrees and partly sunny. LIKE IT MATTERS!

Yeah. I’m in a mood. Woken up to the sounds of Three Days Grace singing and coming out of a dream that included characters from my current novel AND Twilight?? My muses are evil bastards.  (And yes, my vampires beat up the sparklepires. It was most amusing.)

Work is draining me today. Have already butted heads with a few people and there is too much to get done in the next two days. Can’t believe Monday is December 1st!!!

This will be short today, because work is insane and I need to get a ton more done before I leave tonight.

Post SparklePire Weekend Update!

24 11 2008

Weather: High 39 with rain/snow mix! It’s MESSY
First off, Cleolinda has posted her Movie in 15 Minutes for Twilight, but be forewarned, if you were on the fence about seeing the film…this may convince you to go see it.SERIOUSLY! Oh and I think SPOILER ALERT goes without saying.

And yes I did see the SparklePire movie and here’s my VERY SPOILEREY review!


I liked it. Seriously. There was still enough cheese to spread on some crackers, but it was nowhere as ridiculous as people are making it out to be.

The sparkle effect would have been better without the shimmer sound effect, and a few of the lines were still as cringe-worthy as they were in the book, but honestly? The actors delivered them without irony and it made it work. And let me tell you? Robert Pattinson deserves every kudo he’s gotten. Edward is not an easy character to bring to life and he did. (There’s a brief dream sequence, which was snatched right out of Dracula, I was WOW! Can I have a movie of JUST THAT SCENE PLEASE??)
Kristen Stewart as Bella was 1000% better than book Bella. I actually didn’t want to strangle her by the end of the movie. The rest of the Cullen’s were awesome and well cast as well. Alice was made of AWESOME as well she should be.

Jacob, Billy and the rest of the soon to be Furry Friends were well cast and they did a nice preview of future territorial wrangling between Edward and Jacob at the end of the film.

(I will state my absolute diehard fangirl status over Jackson Rathbone who played Jasper. MINE. SERIOUSLY. And I’m dying to see the opening sequence of the next movie. ZOMG! )

Jasper's got TEEF!


There was actually PLOT in the movie and the added sequences were DEFINITELY an improvement. There were intentional laughs that were actually funny and it was kinda nice to see High School kids actually being HIGH SCHOOL KIDS, not cast rejects from Gossip Girl. And Charlie, Bella’s Dad? Was an actual 3 dimensional character.
The wire work and some of the effects were a little meh, but I figure they’ll do better on the next one.
So all in all, I really dug the film. And bonus points for using “Supermassive Black Hole” by Muse over the Baseball sequence (Which was surprisingly NOT made of suck!) And “Bella’s Lullaby” was beautiful.

My mum and sister both liked the movie as well, though I think my sister has a lower threshold for cheese than me.
I’ll go see it again. And will probably get the DVD. And am happy they’re making the sequel.

On a completely different note, I seem to be closing the door on my old life and walking face forward into my new one without making the effort. Some things transpired over the weekend that made me realize that trying to fix a lot of what’s wrong with my RL relationships (Brian not included) is never going to happen. They’re broken and will remain so. Bri and I are on the same pge but his Tupperware leaked this weekend (our euphemism for having a sudden emotional surge over things we hadn’t dealt with. ) A lot of this is family related and I won’t go into it here. Suffice it to say that we are both standing on the threshold of this shiny new life for ourselves and we’re trying to sever the ties holding us back in this dank, grey DEAD thing that has kept us miserable for so long. We haven’t been happy about much in the past 3 years, excepting each other. And that may be the one thing that saved us, that we had each other.

Writing continues to flow. I got 4500 words packed in on Saturday and have started another chapter. Nice thing was I actually got NEW text added to scenes that were hanging and managed to get some plot holes filled. This is probably still only going to be a 75 – 100K story. But then I can get back to the Incubi and Vampires in my other stories. 😉

Time to start wrapping up for the day…
Here, have a video:
Paramore — Decode (From the Twilight Soundtrack)

And that will be it for today, my lovelies. I have to go home and hem curtains. Yes. I know. My life is so damn exciting. ::yawn::

Finally Friday and ZOMG! Sparkle Weekend is here!

21 11 2008

Weather: High 33 and SUNNY! (It was 18 when I walked to my office this morning! BRR!)

Yep– Mom, Kirsten and I will be indulging in Twilight on Sunday. Yes I know most people are scoffing, but I have this horribly irresistible urge to see almost every vampire film, regardless of quality. So this is no exception. So I may cringe my way through it, but I HAVE TO SEE IT!

I’ve been fighting off a migraine all day which is why I’m dragging so horribly. We need to get a crapload of stuff done around the house in case the in-laws end up coming over for dinner tomorrow night. They’ve postponed on us for two weekends now.Not that I’m really complaining, because we have a lot to do, but it’s just making me nuts not knowing.

Bri has a lead on a temp position that would at least give him some income for a few weeks. Hopefully he’ll get it. It starts on Monday if he does.

LJ seems a bit slow today seeing that a lot of my FList are heading to PhilCon which is run by some people on my FList as well. So not much in the way of posting over there. Facebook is sporadic and MySpace is….well the usual.

I think my brain has already left for the day and I have an hour left on the clock. SIgh.

And on that note I will post this:
More from the Studio with DM:

And this!

And will now depart for the wilds of Indiana and peace and quiet!

I am a GOTH! Not a Douche vamp wanna be!(Per se.)

20 11 2008

Weather: HIgh: 34 degrees and Sunny. ARGH!

I’ll explain the subject line later.

This morning’s commute is made of FAIL and this day is FIRED ALREADY! Missed my usual train for not one but TWO goddamn freight trains. Sigh.  Add on “Girl Stuff” the sequel trying to yank my uterus out everytime I stand up and you have all the elements of an “I’m going to go medieval on your sorry ass and not in a good way” kinda day.

Just got back from having coffee with Lisa. VERY COLD but  it was great to sit and talk with her. So much going on in both our lives lately and I miss talking to her on a more regular basis.

The reference in the subject line is from last night’s South Park about the Goth kids getting faced with a huge influx of Hot Topic Vamp wannabes. I always found the vamp side of the Goth movement to be a little pretentious and D & D for my tastes. South Park was HYSTERICAL. It ended with the Goth’s stopping the Vamps by burning down the Hot Topic. Accompanied by the song “Burn Down Hot Topic” . Which I want as my ringtone. NOW!

Comedy Central has the full ep up for viewing.

Gotta dash. Few things to finish up for the day and then home. ARGH!

It’s a meh kinda day…

19 11 2008

weather: High: 41 degrees and WINDY!

Just a quick blog post today as I’m really behind on some projects and I spent WAAAAy too much time blog spamming yesterday. Apparently my brain had other plans. Read on.

Working some filler scenes for “When the Lights Go Out” and have been revisiting both Carrion Dreams and Dark of the Mirror so I can get back to work on them as soon as I wrap up this cracktastic plot-bunny-that-became-a-novel-without-intention!

Tonight I’m going to attempt to get the damn sewing machine up and running.  Yeah, I know I keep saying that, but I HAVE to get those damn curtains hemmed and up before the weekend. And I need to have the sewing machine running in order to get started on the Christmas gifts I intended to make. (REALLY may have bitten off more than I could chew there. )

Taking my mum and sister to see Twilight on Sunday. Hopefully if we make the first showing, we should be able to avoid MOST of the squeeing fangirl contingent. HOPEFULLY!

Had both Breaking Benjamin’s Dance with the Devil and Three Days Grace’s Get Out Alive going through my head today. Been playing them a little repetitively to be honest. Lyrically and musically they speak to me. Can’t explain why, but obviously the subconcious is feeling a little pokey and proddy right now. I’ve had so much emotional baggage on the back burner for so long that some of it has started tipping forward into the forebrain, pestering me for some resolution.  HAd a moment the other day that seems to sum up how I’m feeling. They’re putting up thehuge Christmas tree in Daley Plaza. I always make sure I’m on that side of the street when I’m walking to the train, because every day for a brief nanosecond of time, I can close my eyes and get a whiff of pure pine forest. And it fills me with joy and peace and a sense of “HOME”.
But as soon as I exhale, it’s gone.
Noise, exhaust, people bellowing into their phones, tension, dread and sewer smells replaces that brief blissful experience and I’m brought back to reality with a sharp knock to the head.

I spent the morning going through a lot of old e-mail, looking for addresses for my annual christmas card list. Instead, found myself revisiting a lot of old drama and recent friend related situations. Oddly enough, all it did was make me sad. I read all the anger I felt at the time and the interactions I had. And also the fact that some of the same people I made some negative comments about turned out to be some of my best friends now. It made me feel very hypocritical, seeing critiques that I know now were out of place. I’m not a gossipy person, but seeing some comments there in black and white made me reassess some things about myself. And not much of it was complimentary or giving me the benefit of the doubt. I know I’m verging on bipolar sometimes and I definitely exhibit behaviour that could be considered OCD, but I hate seeing that side of myself public that I try so hard to not exhibit. It’s an ugly judgmental side that I wish I could just do away with.

There are friends I’ve released from my circle that will never return, mostly because I have no interest in re-engaging them. Mostly because we are not the same people anymore and we don’t fit in each others lives, and partly because there are some things that cannot and will not be forgotten. I let time deal with the forgiving part. But as my husband will attest, I have a memory like a steel trap. I don’t forget things. I have reacquainted myself with other people who I’d distanced myself from for a while, trying to get to know them better now that some mitigating circumstances have been removed. And I’m better friends with them now than I was initially, whic does make me exceedingly happy.

I don’t know if it’s just the hormones talking but I’m having a difficult time figuring out where I fit in anymore. Maybe it’s age or just the fringe aspect of my interests, but I’m finding it hard to relate to a lot of people in my life, both online and off. Not that it has anything to do with whether they’re good people or interesting or a source of happiness for me. It’s more that I still feel that chilly gap between me and them that does not allow for the kind of connections I see in other people. I’ve always kept people somewhat at arm’s length, even when I hold them close. Doesn’t make sense I know. And thie past week I had some people disconnect from me, at least one because I don’t think I interacted wenough with her online. This raised a concern in me, but one I don’t really want to resolve.

I seriously would prefer to sit in a quiet room and write than interact with people, either in RL or online. Maybe it’s the malaise of working in a big city and a commute that forces me to be in close proximity to people I have no respect for or commonality with. Yes I hear the snobbishness in that statement, but understand, I spend the duration of my commute writing and conjuring stories and scenarios in my head. I am surrounded by people close to my age discussing why their marriages suck or how drunk they’re getting/got this weekend. I get weird looks and comments from my co-workers who want to know why I’m spending my lunch hour writing instead of eating lunch in the lunchroom and contributing to the glut of bitchy gossip.  I’m a 41 year old Goth/Steampunk stuck in a right wing conservative blue collar area. I’m not allowed free expression or, heaven forfend, any sort of contrary opinion. And yes, I realize not every single person around me is this way. But you couldn’t tell from what I have to hear and put up with on a daily basis. My head is crowded with things I want to write about. And when I interact online, I tend to do so when I feel I can contribute to a conversation or maybe offer some support. I am not a social person, though some would say I’m wrong about that. But I’m not. I do better one on one with people.

At least I can come home to a husband who is in the same boat, so to speak. He at least comes from a field that supports the personality and expression we both clutch to us so hard.

I guess where all this malaise is also coming from is I’m tired. Bone fucking weary. TIred of having to hide and defend who I am, what I love and what I intend to do. If I was in my 20s still, I ‘d be saying “Fuck them! Rebellion!”  But now? I just want to live my goddamn life. I think I’ve earned that right by now. Let’s face it, I’m not happy with the person who’s shell I have to wear right now. She’s unhappy. Unhealthy. And not reflective of the person who is screaming to get out.

Anyway. didn’t intend this to go on as it did. But there you go. The joys of online venting.

Gotta get back to work before I have another person go mental on me. SIgh.

LJ Blackout Post #4– Well that was brief…

18 11 2008

Apparently LJ is back up. The addicts are weeping and we’re all refreshing our pages feverishly.

ETA: It’s very slow right now, so I’m gonna stay away for a bit.  Need to get some writing done anyway.

LJ Blackout Post #3 — Revenge of the SpamPost

18 11 2008

AH! Lunchtime with the Cult’s She Sells Sanctuary blaring in my cube! (Ahh the joys of cubemate being out today–she’s not a bad person, but she plays Oldies Radio all damn day!)


There. Don’t you feel better!

I’m making this short– going off to use my lunch hour 45 minutes to get some writing done.

LJ BLackout post #2 — Electric Boogaloo

18 11 2008

So Twitter has finally come back up and I’ve been playing Facebook Status Comment Tennis with a few people. Interesting way to spend time while LJ is down.

Why is it Nick Cave can make anything sound dark and depraved? LOVE HIM.

Have a skull cracker of a headdache right now. It’s making my work difficult and the fluorescent lights sheer torture to be under.

Have become a huge fan of “The Big Bang Theory” and “How I Met Your Mother.” both have become must see TV on Monday nights for me and the hubby.  “Heroes” last night was a giant ball of “OMGWTF!?!?!” and “You’re kidding, right?”. It still watchable, but it’s getting more convoluted than it needs to be. And I’m a fan of “Lost”. Just saying.

Listening to my usual “Devon’s Mix” this morning and has been made of win as a soundtrack. Got “One Hundred Years” by the Cure up right now. EXCELLENT!

Gearing up to go see Twilight this weekend with my mum. Should be interesting. I’m sure it will make a ton of money, and be critically panned. Sigh.

Think it’s time to go heat up my lunch.

Be back shortly.

Vid #2: MORE New Depeche Mode in the Studio. WHY DO THEY TEASE US SO???

LJ BLackout 2008 Post #1

18 11 2008

weather: High: 33 Degrees — Sunny. AND ME WITHOUT SUNGLASSSES!! IFOR!!

I’ll be doing mini-posts today. Trying to emulate a LJ envrions for the moment.

I’m currently trying to wake the hell up. Coffee is ineffectual against the beast that is my lack of sleep.
And zee i-pod was doing it’s best to get me riled up on the walk into work. “Honour 2003” by VNV Nation and “Kine” by Abney Park?  Them’s fightin’ songs! Walked into the office with a huge determined chip on my shoulder. Hopefully this means that I will get something done today. Lots to work on as it is.

Kirsten getting laid off still has me steamed. I understand it from the financial point of view, but my gods, the amount of effort she put into that job! Flying back and forth between KC and Nashville and L.A. and Minnesota, sometimes multiple times in one week? Working weekends? Late nights? AND PLANNING A WEDDING ON TOP OF IT ALL??? Just sucks, is all I’m saying. She did more work than most of the people in that organization.  I know she’ll land on her feet as there have always been a ton of people trying to recruit her to their companies. I just hope they come through for her now.

This economy continues to suck in a massive way. So now my sister, my brother, my brother in law and my husband are all unemployed.  Not good anyway you look at it. My mum’s retired so she doesn’t enter into it.

HA!  Twitter crashed the minute LiveJournal went down. I find that absolutely amusing.

Gonna post this now with more to come.

Have a video for the mo:
Bauhaus — She’s in Parties